Layla Al-murshidi

When you find your falling

“Your brain just doesn’t really work well with algebra.” said every math teacher I’ve ever met. I had always been good at math, so when I immediately started failing my algebra class I knew something was wrong. The beginning of Eighth grade had been fine, but algebra just never clicked with me. Every time I walked into Mrs. Munsey’s class I felt like posters were laughing at me with their overly enthusiastic quotes about succeeding, when all the class brought me was failure. The loneliness hung over my shoulders like a winter coat two sizes too big. I didn’t have any friends to help me understand or sit with. At one point I started hanging out with this girl, named Ana, at lunch. Ana always looked so put together, yet when you got to know her you figured out she was the opposite. She always had sparkly glitter across her cheek bones, and she always smelt like fruit. I always spent my lunch crying on and on about how I hated math while she did her homework she forgot to do from the night before. When I asked her for input on the situation she always had the same reply every time, “You got to fall before you fly, Layla.”  After receiving the same quote from Ana I had heard a million times before, I walked into math class. I plopped down in my seat to realize that the test paper I had turned in last class had a big thirty three at the top. I had gone to all of the tutoring sessions and studied the whole week before. My brain started to flow with so many thoughts at the same time. I was angry with myself, upset with myself, but most of all disappointed with myself.  Before I could even stop it from coming out of my mouth I was yelling the words, “I just keep falling!” The whole class looked at me like I was going bonkers.

            The next class Mrs. Munsey had decided to make a seating chart. I felt my stomach drop because 90% of the class were super smart seventh graders that would always scream how good they did even though they never studied. I came into class and sat beside a girl in seventh grade named Haley. She reminded me of Ana being so put together, yet she was shy and would stay really quiet for the most of the class. Being myself I decided that even though I wasn’t flying didn’t mean that I couldn’t make friends along the way. Every day I began to talk more and more to her, and felt we were becoming really good friends. A quarter way through the year Haley started to introduce me to her other friends in the class. When the word was out that I would need to drop the class if I couldn’t get at least a B on the next test, every one of the super smart seventh graders that I found intimidating offered to help. That week I had stayed after every day with a different one of my newly made friends to look over notes with them. I even did extra homework to prepare myself for the quiz. As I walked in the room the day of the quiz something was different, I could feel it. The inspirational quotes on the wall actually felt inspirational, and I felt more focused on what was in front of me. After I had finished the test I couldn’t bring myself to submit, so I just sat there contemplating as if there was another option. When I finally brought myself to reality I found that everyone was watching my screen almost more anxious than me. As I hit the submit button I closed my eyes, for I couldn’t stand the disappointing look on Haley’s face. When I didn’t hear clapping or cheering I knew that it was too late, and I had to accept the facts. I opened my eyes and the number seventy-nine were writing at the top. I was a bird in the rain, and I had finally hit the ground. Everyone had started to pat my back and assuring me that there was another way, but I knew that it was far too late and it had been my only chance. The class was quiet as a mouse. Everyone had turned their head when we hear a small voice ask from the back of the class. “Shouldn’t number four be A not C?” it had come from one of the know-it-alls of the class who happened to be a seventh grader.  Mrs. Munsey then decided to stand up and tell us that there would be one extra point added to our scores because of this error. The whole class stood up and started clapping and cheering for me. I finally felt like I was flying. That day I had finally realized that if you just hang in there, things will always get better if you try your best.